Hospice and Palliative Care
I've written about my own experience with hospice in my book DYING: A BOOK OF COMFORT. When my father died, my family and I were able to help him do so with the help of a wonderful hospice in Southern California. When my mother died, at the home of my brother and his wife, they too -- Mom and Steve and Sue -- were able to get through a difficult death chiefly because a Utah hospice helped them deal with practical, emotional, and spiritual issues. I expect there are inadequate hospices somewhere, but that has not been my experience.

People often wait too long to call about hospice. What hospices know how to do is alleviate pain and suffering. As soon as pain is an issue, look into the option of hospice care or palliative care. Most of it is done in the home, with hospice volunteers helping families cope. If you aren't sure that that someone is dying, let hospice experts and your physician help you figure things out. Don't wait too long -- because what they are good at is helping people feel comfortable, and most professionals in the regular health care system are not nearly so good at that. Palliative care serves an important function.

Following are links to some resources. To find a good hospice near you, ask friends if they know of a good local hospice; ask the social workers at your local hospital for a referral; check the yellow pages under Hospices; ask for referrals through the local American Cancer Society, an Agency on Aging, Visiting Nurse Association, or house of worship. Check with the National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization (click on link below, or call NHPCO’s HelpLine at 1-800-658-8898). Check with the local state departments of health or social services to learn which hospices are certified (making them eligible for Medicare and in some states Medicaid). Or Google hospices and your zip code (which may turn up hospices that do not belong to NHPCO as well as those that do).

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